Dear Abuser,

New readers, This won’t make sense until you read 955 Days

Dear Abuser,

I won’t say your name. You made the national news. You’re about to face trial for attempted murder. When I first heard the news, the revengeful side of me thought, karma’s a bitch. However, after all the articles, Facebook posts + people from my past messaging me… I started praying.

Sometimes I wonder what I would say to you if I ever saw you again…

Thank you for giving me my first son. He won’t know you, but will be warned about people like you. You’re missing out on a great kid. Thank you for punching me in the face… That woke me up from the spell I was under. I started to discovered my self worth and realized I deserve the world… And have found someone who has given it to me.

There are moments I feel sorry for you, but then I look in mirror and see the scar on the bridge of my nose. It’s a constant reminder that I survived you and I don’t have to be afraid anymore. You have no control over what happens and you’re completely powerless. I know the feeling.

It’s been five years since that morning; That day, my new life began. The girl that was tricked into loving you died that day. I watched my life go up in flames and I realized that the fire torched my chains along with it. Without you hurting me, I don’t think I would’ve been freed from those chains. The Khaleesi within me was born. As Ariana Grande says; Thank you, next.

When the police showed up you told them I hit you first, that I provoked you into hitting me. The same story you told everyone… That I was the crazy one. I was then 25% percent at fault in their book. Only 75% of my hospital bills were paid for because of that lie. You fooled the best; Police officers, judges, parole officers, pastors… Not anymore. A majority of us know who you are and what you stand for. I’m sure there are some out there that still believe the facade and I pray for them.

I pray that Talon won’t feel the affects of this. I pray that you don’t get set free and do this to someone else. I pray for your family and the pain you’ve caused them. I pray that I never see you again. Despite everything, I pray for your soul.

Some facts;

• Every 9 seconds in the US a woman is assaulted or beaten.

• Around the world, at least one in every three women has been beaten, coerced into sex or otherwise abused during her lifetime.

• Domestic violence is the leading cause of injury to women—more than car accidents, muggings, and rapes combined.

• Nearly 1 in 5 teenage girls who have been in a relationship said a boyfriend threatened violence or self-harm if presented with a breakup.

• Everyday in the US, more than three women are murdered by their husbands or boyfriends.

• Domestic violence victims lose nearly 8 million days of paid work per year in the US alone—the equivalent of 32,000 full-time jobs.

• Based on reports from 10 countries, between 55 percent and 95 percent of women who had been physically abused by their partners had never contacted non-governmental organizations, shelters, or the police.

If you know anyone who’s struggling with this, or you’re struggling through it, PLEASE tell someone. Reach out for help. YOU ARE NOT ALONE.


Donate here

“I won’t let the pain turn my heart into something ugly. I will show you that surviving can be beautiful.” – Christy Ann Martine

Published by HoisiHouse

Hi, I'm Spencer Joii. I'm a mother of 2 boys renovating our family home one room at a time.

3 thoughts on “Dear Abuser,

  1. You said it beautifully! You are a very talented writer because you are real and transparent. You are braver than you will ever know. You are one of the most beautiful, kindest souls I have ever met. I am so grateful to have you as my sister!!! Love you! #hoisigirls4ever

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s